


Pain Prescription

by Shinocchi



Series: Silent Redemption [2]
Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Dirty Talk, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, M/M, Pain, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-27
Updated: 2013-12-27
Packaged: 2018-01-06 08:40:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1104761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinocchi/pseuds/Shinocchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After being together for months, Koujaku and Noiz realized that love wasn't enough to keep each other sane in their relationship. </p><p>And they learned it through the hardest, but best way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pain Prescription

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fio13](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fio13/gifts).



> This fic is a direct sequel of [Proof to be Alive](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1076281). I initially planned this together but it gotten too huge I've no choice but to separate them ;_; 
> 
> It's not a direct continuation but it does contain references to the previous fic, only if you squint hard enough lmao. The first fic was basically the prologue (how everything started), and this is the epilogue (how things changed and how it progressed from there), if I am to describe this. 
> 
> I dedicate this fic to my dear OTP/3 buddy, [Fio](http://archiveofourown.org/users/fio13), who had helped me with a lot of things and I can't express enough on how grateful I am ;w; Thank you <3 And I hope you enjoyed the poison /smirks
> 
> Self-beta'd & I apologize for any mistakes & errors.

“What do you want for dinner?”

“Pizza.”

“No pizza. You've eaten too much of those. Choose something else.”

“…pas—“

“No pasta either.”

Koujaku stood in front of the bathroom mirror as he tidied up his almost-dried hair. Sitting lazily on the hairdresser’s bed, Noiz opened up his laptop on his lap, typing away on his keyboard as he shot Koujaku an irritable glare.

 

* * *

 

It had been three months since Koujaku and Noiz started their unusual relationship. Their daily lifestyle didn't change much, minus the fact that Noiz had started barging into Koujaku’s house more often after Koujaku gave him his house keys. Koujaku continued his hair styling business; but Noiz…He wasn't sure what Noiz was up to. Although so, he chose to believe that the brat had become more disciplined and cautious with whatever he was doing after the last incident. So, instead of pestering him on the matter, he simply let him be. He was fine with whatever lifestyle Noiz was living as long as the brat showed up every few days in his house.

…Although so, it was a lie if Koujaku was to say that he was completely unconcerned with the brat. At first, Koujaku intended to completely let him do what he wanted because he trusted that they had things settled between them and that they were already well aware with each other’s positions in the relationship. But as days became weeks and eventually, months, he realized that it was impossible to wipe the brat’s existence out of his mind entirely. He started becoming extremely observant towards every detail that was related to Noiz, the sign of cuts and scars on Noiz’s body being one of them; he would also ask Noiz about what he did every day out of habit (earning himself an unsatisfied scowl every time); and he still found himself become abnormally conscious with the mentions of “Rhyme”, “rabbit”, or even “noise”. He understood that it was almost impossible for him to control what Noiz wanted to do. And it was impossible for Noiz to report his everyday doings to him.

But he couldn't help it. The lack of response he received from Noiz  sometimes made him wonder if their feelings were even mutual.

Noiz -- naturally -- wasn't a person who knew how to express emotions openly and Koujaku should know it better than anyone else, especially after they confessed their feelings towards each other. Although their sex life was pretty consistent, Koujaku still felt that something was missing between them. It just didn’t feel right for him. It was not something he could ask Noiz about, either. In fact, the mere action of voicing out to him would probably push him even further away from him. 

Finally decided that Noiz was an inexperienced brat and that he definitely needed more guidance from him, Koujaku figured that perhaps he should at least attempt to show some effort first instead of having to wait for Noiz to learn everything by himself. At times when he knew Noiz would be dropping by his place, he would request for extra toppings on the pizza which he usually bought back for dinner. Noiz’s reaction was disappointing, though. He simply glanced at the pizza and returned his attention to his laptop. After a few miserable attempts, Koujaku gave up. 

There were also times when Koujaku offered Noiz a haircut whenever he saw Noiz’s hair started going out of shape. Noiz would refuse at first, saying something about Koujaku being gross and too sappy for his liking. But Koujaku's persistence was way out of his expectation. Eventually, he gave in. And before he knew it, he found himself sitting in front of the mirror with a frown on his face while Koujaku snipped away. After the hair cut, Koujaku would proudly show him different angles of his “new” hairstyle by turning him around in front of the mirror until a pissed off Noiz left the place, forcefully sweeping the annoying old man off as he stormed out of his house. 

Noiz’s lack of response towards Koujaku’s effort sometimes made Koujaku feel annoyingly stupid. He thought he could work their relationship off with the few past experiences he had, but it seemed to him that whatever that used to work in the past did not even help him to reach out to Noiz. 

Perhaps the only reason that still held them together was the small, subconscious actions Noiz would conduct whenever they shared the same space. Koujaku would always find a sleeping Noiz with his laptop still on beside him when he returned late from work. He would always inform Noiz in case he would be late, but even so, Noiz would stubbornly turn a deaf ear towards the supposedly important information. And sometimes when they sat side-by-side in their comfortable silence, Noiz would subconsciously lean against him, his expression blank and unreadable, as if that action meant nothing at all. There was one time when they were walking along the street and Noiz tried to hold Koujaku’s hand but was aggressively swept off as the older man told him off, telling him that it wasn’t appropriate to conduct such "intimate" act in public. Noiz’s expression was complicated at first, but then he gave Koujaku a smirk while the hairdresser felt heat rising to his face upon realizing that Noiz must’ve found out the _real_ reason as to why he refused to let the brat hold his hand.

Those were the only things that kept Koujaku sane in their relationship.

Their relationship was good. Everything seemed fine. They had their own personal lives and they spent physical time together adequately. But when they ventured into their fourth month together, the times they spent having sex decreased tremendously. Koujaku started to feel a hint of frustration but he – feeling humiliated for acting like a sex-deprived teenager – decided to endure it. Their last sex was fierce and aggressive, ending with Koujaku proclaiming that his stamina was still strong and that Noiz might need more practice to keep up with him. However, Noiz did not respond like how he usually did upon hearing that; instead, he cleaned himself up and dozed off to sleep, leaving early the next morning without informing Koujaku. 

Then, Noiz’s traces faded again. Koujaku started to feel uneasy because it reminded him horribly of the time when he lost sight of the brat only to find him seriously injured days later. Although Noiz replied to every single one of his messages, Koujaku couldn’t help but feel edgy when he didn’t see him physically.

That was the time when he started to suspect that Noiz was hiding something from him.

 

* * *

  

Noiz walked along the streets as he eyed his surroundings nonchalantly. He thought it might be a good time to laze around in Koujaku’s house, but he pushed the thought away when he realized that Koujaku might not be in. It was meaningless for him to be there if Koujaku wasn't in. He was contemplating if he should finally go home when a pair of strong hands pulled him into a dark alley.

 

***

 

Koujaku decided to leave work earlier. He had been overly edgy these days and it was starting to affect his business. He walked out to the night streets and scanned through the city buzzes. There were few times when he would find Noiz squatting outside the door, clearly waiting for him. The brat would usually greet him with a wave of his hand and they would then buy dinner and head home together. But there were also times when he overlooked the brat and finding himself being smacked in the head moments after he stepped out of the shop. After recovering from the impact, he would then scan around for a glimpse of green, taking great effort to “gently” motion the surrounding ladies out of the way before he chased after Noiz and gave the brat another smack on the head as revenge. 

Today, however, the brat was nowhere to be seen. Sighing, he locked the door and strolled through the crowd.

 

*** 

 

“Do you want to play today?”

A huge man grabbed Noiz from behind, holding his arms backwards. But Noiz had no intention to escape anyway. Another man moved closer to him and grinned devilishly at him, caressing his face at the same time. 

Noiz gave him a lazy smirk and bit him hard in his finger, oozing blood out instantly. 

The man cried out in pain and stumbled a few steps back. Noiz didn’t have the time to struggle out of the other man’s grip before he felt his back hitting the cold bricked wall as another pair of hands strangled his neck.

 

***

 

“Another fight?” 

“Yeah. I think this one’s pretty bad.” 

 _Argh will they stop it already_. Finishing his beer, Koujaku sighed as he overheard the conversation from the table behind him. Fights were pretty normal in Midorijima even when the island was supposed to be more peaceful now. There were still riots in certain areas and the Lib teams now only played minor roles in peacekeeping as the police force became stricter with their discipline. 

“He got beaten up pretty badly though.” 

“You’ve got any idea who he is?” 

“Hmmm, I can’t be sure but I think it’s that brat who used to be in that…what you call that Rhyme team again? The one with greens and rabbits…” 

“Ruff Rabbit.” 

The name came out of Koujaku’s mouth reflexively and he felt his grip on his beer bottle tremble. 

“Yeah, yeah! That’s the-- hey, where are you going?!”

 

***

 

Koujaku arrived just in time to pull the man’s hands off Noiz’s neck, throwing the assailant off. His other hand immediately supported Noiz by grabbing him on the waist before he fell to the ground. Noiz pushed him away upon feeling his grip and he slid down into a sitting position as he leaned against the wall, coughing loudly and trying to catch his breath. 

Koujaku wasn’t sure who he should direct his anger towards – the group of people scattering away upon realizing who they were dealing with, or Noiz, who was looking up at him as the older man scowled at the trail of red dripping down the corner of his mouth. 

Koujaku had feared that Noiz might get himself into trouble again. The fact that he knew nothing about what Noiz had been doing wasn’t helping to ease his anxiety at all. But he always tried to push all the negativity off his mind because he wanted to trust Noiz. Now, though, he was trying very hard to hold on to the trust, to stop it from crushing just because…

_Because he still didn’t know Noiz well enough to actually trust him._

Koujaku raised his hand, intending to smack Noiz hard on the head like how he usually did but his hand stopped in midair and he ended up glaring furiously at the brat, who stared at him unblinkingly. There was a kind of hidden emotion in his eyes but Koujaku was unable to determine exactly what it was, especially when he was also bearing a whole bunch of complicated emotions in him now. A few moments of silence and he lowered his hand, punching the wall instead. His hand started bleeding and Noiz stared at the blood dripping down from his cuts blankly. 

Koujaku squatted down and looked at Noiz. Noiz continued staring at him as Koujaku used his injured hand to wipe the blood off the corner of his mouth. He quickly pulled his hand away when he realized that he had accidentally dirtied Noiz’s face with his own blood, but Noiz pulled his hand back and placed a firm kiss on the back of his hand, kissing the wound and licking the blood away. 

Upon seeing this, Koujaku forcefully pulled his hand out of Noiz’s grip. Although he was mad at Noiz for a lot of reasons – him getting himself into trouble; him not telling him what he had been doing; him not explaining what happened – he felt a swell of pain in him when he saw Noiz looking so insecure and _fragile_  at this very moment. He was sure that this was not the best time to talk about it and he knew his temper would lure the worst scenario out of him, so he decided to escape from the situation by standing up, turning his back towards Noiz, and walked away. 

“Hey.”

Koujaku stopped his track, feeling a plunge of self-hatred washing all over him. 

“You’re leaving me here? Like how you did four months ago?” 

Noiz was an insufferable brat, a brat with no common sense. But the brat was young, he was inexperienced; and above all, he was hurt. His entire existence hurt Koujaku. But he knew perfectly well that the one thing that hurt him the most was the fact that Noiz remembered _everything_. No matter if it was a sweet memory or a terrible one, he always remembered. 

Koujaku turned around and saw Noiz looking at him with longing in his eyes that instantly crushed the older man’s emotional walls. 

“..What?” 

Noiz smiled lightly as he held out his hand.

“….hold me.”

At that instant, Koujaku felt all anger left him. As he wrapped Noiz’s cold hands in his, he felt Noiz gripping it back firmly. Those scarred hands might be cold, but the fact that Noiz trusted him enough to rely on him had warmed him enough to calm him down.

 

* * *

  

Both Noiz and Koujaku never talked about the incident after that night. Koujaku couldn’t find the right time or the right way to ask him, plus he figured that Noiz would probably remain silent about it even if he _did_  asked. Instead, he realized that Noiz was starting to distance himself away from him. The brat was missing most of the time, and he rarely dropped by the hairdresser’s house nowadays. Although Koujaku was worried sick about this sudden change, he never asked Noiz about it, assuming that Noiz needed his own privacy and freedom. He didn’t want to interfere with the brat’s personal life, as how Noiz didn’t interfere with his. 

This situation, however, made Koujaku cherished the time they spent together even more. Even though they often spent their time doing their own stuff in their own comfortable silence, it didn’t matter to Koujaku even if they didn’t manage to talk to each other because at the end of the day, what mattered was they would end up sleeping in the same bed. Noiz would subconsciously hugged Koujaku halfway through his sleep and the older man would wrap him firmly in his own arms as he felt the warmth of Noiz’s body accompanied by his shallow breaths, and falling asleep to the soft scene coming from his hair. It was then when Koujaku felt at peace. It gave him the illusion that Noiz was safe -- at least for now -- and even if anything was to happen at that moment of time, he could protect him.

That was all he ever needed.

 

* * *

 

 

He didn’t know if he was doing it right. Noiz poked roughly on the dried wound on his left thigh. The color on the wound darkened and he instantly knew that he had accidentally injured it again. He clicked his tongue, frustrated, and got up, preparing to clean the blood off when someone started knocking furiously on his door. Frowning deeper, he opened the door to find a group of Lib members standing in front of him, all bearing the same devilish grins as they looked at him interestingly. Instantly understanding what they wanted, Noiz retreated back into the house, let them, in, and closed the door behind them.

 

***

 

Koujaku took a quick look out of the window before he went back to trimming the hair of his last customer for the day. It was raining heavily, the dull atmosphere created by the rain forming a sense of uneasiness in Koujaku. He closed his shop and stepped out with an umbrella in his hand. He was certain that Noiz would not turn up on a day like this so he took his own sweet time as he walked back to his house. 

He didn’t sense the urgency to rush home and as he was contemplating if he should visit Aoba since they had not been seeing each other for quite some time now, the thought vanished instantly the moment he saw a familiar shadow on his doorstep. 

“What are you doing here?!” 

Noiz was sitting casually on Koujaku’s doorstep, raindrops smashing on him mercilessly. He was drenched wet from head to toe and he only looked up when Koujaku stood right in front of him as he smiled weakly at the older man’s anxious expression. 

“Why didn’t you go inside?!” Koujaku shouted. Noiz can barely hear him from the loud noises both from the surrounding and from the inside of his head. Koujaku grabbed Noiz’s arm and pulled him into the shelter of his umbrella. “You’ll catch a cold, idiot.” 

Noiz remained silent and allowed himself to be dragged into Koujaku’s room, leaving trails of water behind them. Koujaku reached out to switch the lights on but before he could do that, Noiz pulled him away, turning him around and merely, just merely, stared at him. Koujaku was surprised with his unusual response but the heat he saw in Noiz’s eyes and the passionate kiss that was forced on him seconds later took his question away from his mouth. It had been a while since they last had sex and assuming that Noiz had finally reached his limit, Koujaku complied into the passion and wrapped his arms around the brat, deepening their kiss by thrusting his tongue deeper into Noiz’s mouth. Noiz’s body was slicked wet, drenched in rain water, and when Koujaku touched his bare back, his hands slipping in a frictionlessly down to his waist, he started taking his wet clothing off, their mouths never left each other. 

Noiz wrapped his arm around Koujaku’s neck, reaching his hand up and releasing Koujaku’s tied hair by pulling off his hair band. Then, he immediately sank his fingers into the hairdresser’s hair, feeling his soft, silky hair texture. Koujaku started to guide them to the bed as they kissed, Noiz tripping and falling backwards, causing him to sit on the bed. Before he could contemplate his next action, Koujaku climbed on top of him and urged him to move to the center of the bed. Koujaku was always aggressive with his actions, especially when he came to sex. And soon, he was kissing Noiz’s neck, sucking on his skin, feeling the wetness that tasted like rainwater on his tongue as Noiz gave out a small moan upon feeling the rough tension against his skin. After a few hard sucks, he stopped, giving the bruising red spot a final lick before he looked up at Noiz’s face. 

That was when he realized something was _really_ wrong with Noiz. 

Noiz’s expression was hard to read, it always was. But at this very moment, Koujaku -- for once -- was not trying to figure out his face, but his _body_. Bruises and scares covered his torso (which some Koujaku recognized as blade cuts); some were new; some were old. However, it wasn't the scars that were grabbing Koujaku's attention, but the bruises that had started luring slight trembles out of the hairdresser. Unable to suppress his curiosity, Koujaku pressed at some of them lightly while Noiz averting his gaze the entire time. Swallowing down his throat, he finally sat up and stared sternly at the younger man. 

“What happened?” 

His voice was calm but the shivers hidden within it wasn't hard to miss. Noiz shifted his gaze to Koujaku as Koujaku continued glaring at him with a strict expression. It reminded him of the first time they met - when Koujaku was so fired up with him as if everything he was to do were pure intentional mistakes. That was when a pool of unexplained, suffocating emotions attacked him, the sorrow hidden behind that stern gaze did nothing but further intensify his nerves.

For a long time, they only looked at each other in silence. Even when they were in the dark, Noiz could see they way Koujaku’s scowl deepened with every passing second. When Noiz averted his gaze again, he finally lost his patience as he grabbed onto Noiz’s legs and spread them wide apart. Shocked at the sudden roughness, Noiz struggled but Koujaku’s grip was too strong he found it hard to even move. Ignoring Noiz’s resistance, Koujaku shot an apprehensive look at his hole and without warning, sank two fingers in at once. Noiz cried out at the sudden pressure but Koujaku turned a deaf ear to his screams as he curled his fingers inside Noiz and nudged the inner walls roughly. Noiz’s inside was awfully loose and the hole was swollen. Koujaku didn’t need more clarification to understand what exactly happened and he felt his heart sink. 

The thought that Noiz had betrayed him occurred in his head but he immediately shook it off because he knew Noiz wasn’t such person to commit an act like this. _He trusted Noi_ z _._ He shot Noiz another questioning glare and pulled his fingers out. 

“What happened?” Koujaku asked again, his tone sterner and firmer. 

Noiz breathed weakly as he sat up to face the older man. Koujaku continued waiting for an answer but all he could see from Noiz’s eyes was more uncertainty and – Koujaku wavered at the sight – a wait for an answer _from him_. What was Noiz waiting for? What did he want him to do? What did he want him to say? 

The repeated “ _But you don’t know him well enough to trust him_ ” recitation in Koujaku’s head was starting to drive him mad. His heart beat furiously against his chest and his rationality started to fade away with every passing minute. At this point of time, he didn’t even care if the brat lied to him. All he needed was an answer. He just needed to know. 

“Did you do it willingly or someone forced you into it?” 

Koujaku tried to probe an explanation out of Noiz as calm as he could. But all he got was more silence accompanied with an impassive face, pushing him nearer to his endurance limit.

 

_But you don’t know him well enough……_

_…….to trust him._

 

Koujaku was about to rage at him when Noiz suddenly whispered.

“What if I say I did it on purpose?”

The instant heart-breaking sensation almost brought tears to his eyes. His anger vanished instantly, replaced by an overwhelming rush of despair. A few minutes later, he moved towards the foot of his bed, attempting to calm his overloaded thoughts down while Noiz moved to the opposite side, urging them into silence again. They didn’t know what to say; or what was the right thing to say. Koujaku felt his own rapid heartbeats and he grabbed his cigarette from the bedside table. Noiz kept his head low, staring at his own legs. Honestly, Koujaku didn’t even know what to feel about the situation. He clicked his tongue, feeling like a useless man even when he was _supposed_ to be more experienced with relationship matters. When Noiz coughed lightly from behind him, Koujaku forced a stop to his thoughts. Dimming his cigarette, he cleared his throat. 

“Does it still hurt?” 

“…no.” A simple reply. 

Koujaku knew he should feel relieved with the answer but the instant swell of pain he felt in his heart suggested otherwise. Not only that he was reminded with the fact that Noiz couldn’t feel pain, but it also dawned on him that Noiz must’ve gone through some kind of rough treatments which can potentially shatter him physically and mentally, based on what he saw on his skin. And yet, he said he didn’t feel it at all.

“No. I don’t feel pain at all,” Noiz repeated. 

“Yeah, I heard you the first time.” 

“I don’t feel it.” 

“I know, brat. I know.” 

A short pause. Then… 

“…I…don’t feel it…at all,” Noiz repeated the same words, his voice now sounded like a whisper. 

“Noiz?” Sensing something wrong, Koujaku turned and looked at him, just to see him burying his face in his hands. _He can almost hear him crying_. 

He took in the sight of Noiz with his back facing him and felt his heart ache when he spotted more bruises on his back. _Argh, what exactly did the brat gone through?_ He reached out, wanting to pat him on the back, but stopped halfway and withdrew his hand back. He waited, but the stifling sound he was expecting to hear did not come. It seemed to Koujaku that Noiz still had his emotions under control but he knew that the brat was at the verge of breaking down seeing the way he trembled as he buried his profile away. He never knew reaching out to Noiz could be this hard and the realization broke his heart. 

“Are you going to explain what happened?” 

Koujaku broke the silence at long last, realizing that things will not progress anywhere if they kept escaping. Noiz kept quiet and Koujaku started assuming that he was going to avoid his question again. But a few seconds passed and he felt the sheet sank behind him as a pair of hands wrapped his body. Noiz was hugging him from behind. 

His lips trembled and his throat felt dry as he placed his hand on top of Noiz’s. Pressing his face into Koujaku’s shoulder, Noiz tightened his embrace. 

“You’re not going to scream at me?” Noiz’s voice rang softly in Koujaku’s ear. “Or beat me up? Throw me out of the house? Say things like you don’t want to see me again?” 

It was hard for Koujaku to register what Noiz was trying to say, the fact that his voice was trembling not helping at all. He was in the midst of digesting his questions when Noiz tilted his head and stared into Koujaku’s eyes with full intensity. 

“You should.” 

“Should what?” Koujaku asked, finally found his voice. 

“Throw me out. Scream at me. Beat me—“ 

“Shut up, brat.” 

“—up. Break up with—“ 

“I say shut up!” 

Koujaku shouted and Noiz froze. He turned and faced the younger man as he cupped his face. There were more uncertainties and more unstable emotions reflecting out of Noiz’s eyes. His eyes were damped; and Koujaku figured that he was right after all, the brat _was_ at the verge of breaking down and the reason why he hadn’t was probably because he was still waiting for Koujaku’s answer. 

Feeling his body working on impulse, Koujaku pulled Noiz in for a deep kiss, hugging him closer and firmer. Noiz closed his eyes out of reflex as he returned his kiss, intertwining their tongues together and hugging Koujaku’s head tightly. 

When they broke their kiss, Koujaku looked at Noiz’s face again and felt his heart shattering into pieces. 

Tears were forming at the corner of Noiz’s eyes and he probably never noticed it himself. 

Koujaku immediately pulled Noiz into a tight embrace and ruffled the brat’s hair aggressively. 

“Now there, what happened to the brat I knew, eh?” Koujaku laughed jokily. 

“Shut up. And stop messing up my hair.” Koujaku couldn’t see Noiz’s expression but he knew he was pouting. 

“Your hair is quite long now.” Koujaku stopped his ruffles and combing Noiz’s hair with his fingers instead. “It has been a while since you had a haircut.” 

“…will you cut it for me?” 

Koujaku stopped playing with Noiz’s hair the moment he heard that. Noiz pulled away from him and shot him another sideway glance with eyes so innocent-looking that made Koujaku smile. 

“Of course I will, brat.” 

 

***

 

It took a while for Koujaku to finally have his emotions under control as he leaned back-to-back with Noiz. 

“Say, how does it feel being inserted?” 

“Haa?!” 

Noiz first question after being uncooperative for so long caught Koujaku completely off guard. 

“You’re so loud.” 

“What weird question is that?!” 

“Is it weird?” 

“Of course it is!” 

“Hmmm…” 

Koujaku’s brain was racing again as he tried to wipe peculiar mental images off his head. That was when a sudden thought hit him. _Could it be that the brat did all those things so that he could better understand the physical tension of being inserted?_ Since he can't feel too much himself.... 

The question sounded extremely ridiculous in Koujaku’s head but then again, he was dealing with the brat, and it shouldn’t come off as a surprise if the brat – being _a brat_ – did things like that. But still, this was going a bit too far… but, wait, he was inexperienced with the world; he didn’t even know what was right and what was wrong, so perhaps this is something common and “appropriate” for him? But the question here is, why would he want to know about this? 

Koujaku was delved so deep in his own thoughts that he didn’t notice Noiz had turned around to stare at him. The brat crawled over and sat right in front of him as he examined Koujaku’s somber expression. 

Grinning, he crept nearer to Koujaku and whispered in his ear. “Are you having a good time imagining it?” 

Koujaku jumped, almost throwing Noiz off the bed. 

“What?! Stop joking. What image will I have, jeez.” 

“Hmmm, I don’t know. Something like me sitting on top of you and you gripping my arms as you cry tears of pleasure?” 

Koujaku gaped at Noiz’s blunt statement and stared shockingly at him as the brat gave him a playful smirk. But seeing Noiz’s expression drew a relieved smile on Koujaku’s face. Feeling that the Noiz he knew had finally returned to him, Koujaku ruffled his hair and gave out a few dry coughs. 

“Anyway, why do you want to know?” 

Noiz climbed away and leaned his back against Koujaku’s back. 

“I just want to know how it’ll feel. But I figured it would be hard for you to explain it to me since you weren’t at the receiving end.” 

“So you assumed whoever that abused you will tell you?” 

Noiz smiled weakly. 

“Technically, it wasn’t ‘abusing’ because I couldn’t feel anything…” His voice trailed off. “..I thought the stronger the impact, the better I could feel it.” He curled up, burying his face in between his knees. “But apparently I was wrong. They left scars, but I still can’t feel anything.” 

Koujaku sighed. How more imprudent can the brat get? He was absent-mindedly ignoring his own body’s and emotion’s condition again by doing reckless things just so he could… just so he could what? It was hard for Koujaku to understand what Noiz was trying to achieve at this point of them so instead, he shook his head and tried to distract him. 

“It doesn’t matter. There’s no need for you to know.” 

Noiz fell silent. 

“It matters. It’s important for me.” 

Koujaku stared sideways at Noiz. He understood how important it was for Noiz to understand what he wanted to know. And the determination in Noiz’s voice had proven it. 

Still hugging his knees, Noiz muttered with a stifled tone which Koujaku almost missed. 

“…What?” he asked, assuming that Noiz was talking to him. 

“I want to make you feel good that way too.” 

Koujaku swore his heart almost jumped out of his throat. He knew Noiz wanted to try everything with him but he didn’t expect him to want to try _that_ too, and above all, he was risking his own body for _him_. 

“Besides…”

Koujaku waited, but the continuation of Noiz’s sentence didn’t come. He turned around and wrapped his arm around Noiz’s waist, urging him to continue. 

“What is it, Noiz?” 

The direct address of his name seemed to do its job. Noiz looked up and stared into Koujaku’s questioning gaze.

“I thought you might want someone who is more….normal.” 

The piercing pain was instant. Koujaku smacked Noiz on the head. 

“If you say that again I swear I’m gonna beat you up real hard.” 

Although so, Koujaku understood where Noiz was coming from. Noiz had been discriminated by almost everyone he was closed with. And the fact that he was extremely cautious about being connected and become related to Koujaku had demonstrated his fear perfectly. Koujaku was the one who assured him that it was alright to be close with someone, but the fact that the fear had started revisiting Noiz proved that Koujaku had not been doing a good job for something he promised.

“It was tough. I tried again and again. But it didn’t work.” Noiz leaned his head in the crook of Koujaku’s neck. “Maybe it’ll never work.” 

The desperation for him to regain his sense, to become _normal_ for Koujaku, was obvious from his tone. Everything he did was for _him_. A sudden surge of self-hatred and guiltiness crashed on Koujaku when he realized that Noiz had been badly hurt because of _him_. There was nothing he could do to erase what had happened and he started to doubt if he did the right decision of being part of Noiz’s life. 

“I can feel the pulses deep inside me but that was it. I can feel the pressure, but I can’t feel the heat, no matter how hard I concentrated. The pleasure I felt was different and I knew my body only reacted because it was just normal physiological reaction. 

Koujaku swallowed hard. He felt his temper rising again as he imagined what people might have done to Noiz. The images in his head terrified him so much to the extent that he swore he would strangle these people to death, crush every single one of their bones, if he ever found out who they were. He furiously grabbed Noiz’s shoulder and forced him to look him in the eyes. 

“Do not ever allow _anyone_ to do that to you again.” 

“Why are you so—“ 

“Promise me.” 

“I don’t—“ 

“Just say it.” 

“Kou—“ 

“You are mine, Noiz! Say it!” 

Koujaku’s voice rose unintentionally and Noiz gaped for a few seconds before a small smile appeared on his face.

 

“ _I’m yours, Koujaku_.”

 

“No, not that. Say you won’t…..what?” 

Noiz smirked as Koujaku stared open-mouthed at him. 

“What did you just…” 

“Hmmmm?” Noiz purposely gave him a playful glare as he inched nearer to Koujaku, their faces so close to each other Koujaku could feel the uneven breath on his face. 

He felt heat rising to his face as Noiz’s linked their fingers together. His heart beat rapidly against his own chest, threatening to explode any second. _What did the brat just say?_  

He was still gaping at Noiz when Noiz wrapped his arms around Koujaku’s neck instead. The brat acted so calm and composed that Koujaku was starting to feel humiliated for being so flustered. 

“What is it?” Noiz asked with a smug grin as he trailed his fingers down Koujaku’s spinal cord. 

Koujaku – still attempting to recover from the shock – took a while to respond. “I-I was saying, if you want to know, you could just ask me.” 

 _No. This was not what he wanted Noiz to say._  

“Know what?” 

 _What was he trying to say again?_  

“………..” 

“Hmmmm? Yes?” Noiz’s hand slid down to Koujaku’s waist, grabbing it firmly. 

“How does it feel to be…” Koujaku swallowed. “…inserted.” 

Koujaku felt his cheek become hotter and he looked away, staring at his wall of decorations instead. 

“Why didn’t you ask me in the first place? I told you it’s okay to ask me anything you want. I promised to teach you about the world, remember?” Koujaku complained in a hushed tone, feeling Noiz closing at him. 

“You won’t turn away from me…?” Noiz asked cautiously. 

“Why would I….oh.” 

 _Oh, I see_. 

Suddenly everything made sense. Koujaku knew Noiz was afraid of the whole idea of being connected, but it hadn’t occurred to him that he might be afraid of being pushed away again. He was right, he didn’t understand Noiz at all. Perhaps he had been carrying all these confusions for a long time, and the reason why Noiz never told Koujaku was probably because of the fear of losing him. Koujaku’s self-hatred attacked him again as he realized that the freedom he had given Noiz all these while must’ve given Noiz the impression that he was pushing him away. It never dawned on him that Noiz was still a child, who subconsciously craved for attention, and Koujaku – feeling like an idiot – thought that leaving him as he was was the best for him. This whole mess was caused by him and he needed to repair this before it was too late. 

Noiz eyed him longingly when he fell into his own thoughts again. Decided that he should wait no longer, he pulled Koujaku’s waist towards him and stripped the remaining clothing off his skin. 

“So you’re saying you’ll do it for me?” Noiz asked mischievously. 

It was too late for Koujaku to take his words back. If he did, it would only prove to Noiz that there were _indeed_ things that he should never asked; but if he didn’t, then he would have to live with the consequences which would potentially change his position and even his entire life. Noiz smirked as Koujaku’s grip on his arms trembled and the next second, Koujaku felt a warm and wet sensation against his throat as Noiz started licking him and planting sucking kisses on it. 

“So, how do I go about it?” 

“Huh?”

“You’re going to teach me, right?” 

The question repeated a few times in Koujaku’s head and he felt his body heating up upon realizing the situation he got himself into. 

“I need to prepare you, right?” Noiz said casually as he eyed Koujaku with an expression filled with yearnings. 

 _Wait, hold it right there. Don’t tell me this brat is serious about fucking me?_  

“Because, unlike me…” 

 _He’s gonna…enter me?_  

“…you’ll feel more pain than I do if I don’t—“ 

“I know, I know!” Feeling too embarrassed to listen to the remaining words, Koujaku interrupted Noiz and reached out to the drawer of his bedside table as he retrieved a bottle of lube and threw it at Noiz. 

Noiz grabbed the lube and looked at Koujaku, confused. 

“We’re using this?” 

“You got a problem with that?” 

“No.” Noiz hummed as he popped the bottle open and poured a good amount of it on his palm. 

“Oi, oi, not so fast, brat.” 

“First you said to use this, now you said no. What exactly do you want?” 

The blush deepened on Koujaku’s cheek as his mind went into a treadmill run again but Noiz never gave him the chance to respond. He threw the bottle on the floor and grabbed Koujaku’s dick without warning, effectively earning a moan Koujaku didn't manage to suppress.

“How about you let me decide how to do it?” Noiz whispered in Koujaku’s ear. “And you let me know which works best for you?” 

Noiz gave Koujaku a satisfactory smirk upon feeling the older man’s dick twitched and hardened in his hand. Koujaku instantly felt a huge rush of restriction as his dominative position got threatened. He had never thought that he would be subjugated by anyone in sex, especially not by _the brat_. 

Then, Noiz started stroking Koujaku’s dick slowly and gently, gauging his expression at the same time as Koujaku stared at him with an uneasy look. Curving his lips upwards, he started gripping Koujaku’s dick harder, causing Koujaku to cry out as he reached out to grab on Noiz’s shoulder for support. He was about to scream at the brat but Noiz lunged forward and stuck his tongue into his mouth, intertwining their tongues together as his strokes turned gentler and slower again. 

Although Koujaku could undoubtedly feel his mind clouding with pleasure, he still found himself being unable to divert his attention away from Noiz’s hand on his dick. Noticing that, Noiz broke their kiss and gave Koujaku a light peck on the cheek. 

“What’s wrong?” he whispered. 

“Huh?” 

“You don’t seem to be enjoying yourself. Am I doing it wrong?” 

“No, no. It’s not that,” Koujaku denied. “It’s just…aaaah!” 

Noiz chose that moment to squeeze hard on Koujaku’s dick and Koujaku jolted, moaning loudly. 

“Now you look more like you’re enjoying it.” 

“You…brat…!” Koujaku gritted his teeth as he tried as hard as he could to stifle his uncontrollable moans. 

Noiz’s strokes slower down after a few hard pumps. Koujaku felt his nervousness heighten, not knowing when the brat would suddenly give him another surprise rough attack while Noiz enjoyed staring at the change of Koujaku’s expressions as he tried probing on different parts of his shaft experimentally to find his sensitive spot. 

“Tell me. Where should I touch you so that you’ll feel good?” 

Koujaku scowled at him, refusing to answer. 

“If you don’t tell me, I would try it out myself,” Noiz said with a hint of tease, starting to coat Koujaku’s dick with the precum beading on the slid. His hand left Koujaku’s dick after he was done coating it and he raised his wet hand in front of the older man, purposely showcasing it, before he put his fingers one by one into his mouth, licking them all clean. 

“Stop that.” 

“…you still taste bitter.” 

“There’s nothing I can do about that.” 

“Hehh.” Noiz gave out a devious grin. “Have you tasted it before?” 

“What?! Of course not!” 

“I see. Do you want to taste it?” Noiz said, thrusting his tongue into Koujaku’s mouth again without waiting for an answer. 

Koujaku felt the bitterness spread inside his mouth and he instantly knew that it was the taste of his own semen. His erection twitched in response as more precum leaked out of the slit and rolled down the underside. Noiz broke the kiss after giving Koujaku a hard suck on the tongue and trailed his tongue down Koujaku’s neck, stopping at his collarbone and giving it another hard suck. He started leaving marks all over Koujaku’s body as Koujaku moaned softly every time he felt the sucking pressure on his skin. After kissing every part of his upper body, he stopped when his kiss got nearer to his nipple.

“So… where do you want me to touch next?” Noiz licked his lips and looked up at Koujaku. 

Koujaku stared at the brat, his breathing uneven. Noiz looked extremely seductive and Koujaku swore the only thing stopping him from pushing the brat down and fuck him hard was because he wanted so stay true to his promise. He was so perplexed with Noiz’s hungry and lustful look that the question Noiz asked him slipped off his mind. Noiz sighed as he bent down and continued his kisses. However, when he reached Koujaku’s nipple this time, he sucked a mouthful of it, sending waves of pleasure at the older man as he cried out loud. 

The intensity sent shivers all over his body as he gripped the mattress to stop himself from trembling too much. Noiz noticed his reaction and reached out to play with his other nipple with his free hand, pinching it softly between his thumb and forefinger. Koujaku  could feel Noiz’s warm breath on his chest, his breathing staggered. And suddenly, the warmness disappeared and he opened his eyes just to be pushed down by Noiz on the bed.

“How was that?” Noiz asked as he laid his head on Koujaku’s chest, listening to Koujaku’s rapid and furious heartbeats as he tried to balance his own breathing. 

“..tired,” Koujaku said breathlessly as he caressed Noiz’s face. 

“Did it feel good?” 

“…yeah.” 

“So how exactly did it feel?” 

“You’re serious about wanting to know everything, aren’t you?” 

“Of course,” Noiz answered firmly. “They didn’t do this to me, though.” 

 _‘They?’_  

Instantly understood who Noiz was referring to, Koujaku swallowed thickly and forced himself to ask the question he was dying to ask. 

“…What did they do to you?” 

Noiz looked up at Koujaku, uncertainties lurking in his eyes again. Then, he sat up, placing his hand on Koujaku’s throat, gripping it harder, and harder….and harder. His grip was so hard Koujaku started to find it hard to breathe and when he was trying to stop Noiz, Noiz spoke. 

“One of them strangled me, like this. Another one…” He reached downwards and grabbed Koujaku’s dick with tremendous strength so hard Koujaku felt as if it’s gonna break into half. “….grabbed me, like this.” 

Koujaku stared at Noiz, horror in his eyes, but Noiz ignored him and continued speaking. 

“It was hard to breathe and I could barely move. Usually two persons will be holding me down, and a few more persons….” Noiz voice trailed away and he released both Koujaku’s neck and dick, hearing Koujaku coughing loudly on top of him. “…will do this.” 

Koujaku had yet to return from his terror when Noiz bent down and started biting and sucking on his neck, then his upper body. His bites were rough and hard, almost enough to draw blood. Halfway through his sucking, Koujaku grabbed his shoulder and pushed him away. 

“…That was…how you got all those marks..” Koujaku muttered weakly. 

Noiz nodded, a complicated emotion on his face. Koujaku felt himself at the verge of breaking down and he wrapped his hands around Noiz’s torso out of reflex, leaning his face against his chest. 

Noiz sighed. When he started speaking again, Koujaku could hear the trembles in his voice, making him hug him firmer. 

“…Hey,” Noiz moved his hand towards Koujaku’s face, tracing his bangs gently. “I’ve got this weird feeling inside me right now. Can you tell me what’s this all about?” 

Koujaku grabbed the hand on his face and kissed the back of it. 

“Describe it to me.” 

Noiz stared at him blankly for few seconds and closed his eyes as he moved Koujaku’s hands up to his chest, where the heart was located. 

“It’s tightening up my heart, as if it’s being squeezed by an invisible force.” Koujaku looked at him eagerly as Noiz concentrated on the feeling. “It makes me hard to breathe. And..” Noiz opened his eyes and looked directly at Koujaku. “…I feel like crying. It’s a horrible feeling. I’ve been feeling this a lot these past few months.” His voice became softer as he concluded. “And now as well.” 

Koujaku could only stare, open-mouthed, at him upon hearing Noiz's descriptions. Raising his hand, he wiped the trail of tears off Noiz’s face, cupping his jaw when he was done with it and looking into his eyes. His heart ached when Noiz looked back at him with emotion so raw and genuine he thought he finally found the real, true Noiz he had been searching for so long. 

He was always trying to find a way to teach Noiz, or to simply describe to him how pain felt like. But Noiz had done a better job than him. He did it. 

Closing their gap, he pressed their foreheads together and closed his eyes while his hand moved downwards against Noiz’s chest and stopped at the place where Noiz’s heart was located. He paused for a few seconds before looking up at Noiz with a gentle smile on his face. 

“So what is it?” Noiz asked, curiosity evident in his tone. 

“What you felt, Noiz, is _pain_.” 

He took Noiz’s hand and guided it to the younger man’s own chest, making sure he can feel his own heartbeats. 

“Remember this feeling. This is what we called _pain,_ ” Koujaku repeated, his grip tightened on Noiz’s hand. 

 

_What you were experiencing was pain. It’s the kind of pain that gives you the most pain. It was the best definition of pain, Noiz._

 

Koujaku pulled Noiz into a fierce kiss and as he caressed Noiz’s cheek, he felt more dampness and realized that those were tears. Then, Noiz pushed him away, turning his back towards Koujaku as he tried to hide his face away and trying to wipe his tears away at the same time. At this point, Koujaku realized that perhaps whatever Noiz did hurt him as much as it hurt Koujaku. 

When both of them finally calmed down, Noiz turned around and looked at Koujaku. 

“Our deal still stands?” 

It took a while for Koujaku to understand and when he finally did, he blushed and nodded. Taking it as a cue, Noiz moved slowly towards him and gave him a rough push, causing him to fall backwards on the bed. He then crawled on top of him, towering over him and looked down at him as he raised his hand, purposely showing it to Koujaku before he inserted his fingers into his own mouth, damping them with saliva. 

Koujaku swallowed hard when Noiz moved his hand to his chest, leaving wet traces on it as he trailed his finger down to his hips, then to his lower body. He stopped at Koujaku’s dick, looked up and smirked playfully at him, and moved his hand away from his erection, heading straight to his hole. Koujaku’s nervousness heightened again when he felt Noiz’s finger circling around the entrance. After giving it a gentle nudge, Noiz looked up at Koujaku again.

“You sure you’re okay with this?” 

Koujaku gulped and after a moment-too-long pause later, he nodded. 

Noiz smiled at him, as if trying to comfort him, before he slowly pushed his finger in. Koujaku gritted his teeth at the foreign sensation but he knew Noiz was trying hard to be gentle with him. He was concentrating on the feeling when he felt a hand on his face. 

“How does it feel?” He could barely make out Noiz’s voice, his head filled with nothing but pain. 

He felt his head at the verge of bursting when Noiz’s finger went deeper into him. Noiz glanced at his expression and stopped, allowing Koujaku to catch his breath. He used his free hand to wipe away the sweat on Koujaku’s face and gently planted a kiss on his forehead. When Koujaku finally managed to breathe properly, he smiled weakly at the brat. 

“…ouch.” 

There was hesitance written all over Noiz's face but Koujaku, noticing it, grabbed his hand before it could move away from his skin and led it to his dick. 

“Touch it.” 

“Why?” 

“It’ll help.” 

“How?” 

“It helps with stimulation and it’ll help my body relax.” 

Koujaku can’t believe what he just said but he didn’t have the time to build his own dignity back as Noiz started doing what he was told, pumping his dick, probing at the sensitive spot he found earlier repeatedly. Koujaku fought back a moan as he gripped on the sheets but as Noiz’s strokes became faster, gasps escaped his lips and the room soon echoed with his loud moans. Grasped a chance, Noiz then entered a second finger alongside the first, instantly feeling Koujaku’s inside tighten. He curled his fingers inside and moved in and out at a moderate pace until he felt it starting to loosen up. Giving it a final stretch, Noiz pulled his fingers out and pressed the head of his own dick against the hole. 

Koujaku looked down to see Noiz looking at him hesitantly again as he nodded, reassuring him that it was fine, and before he knew it, Noiz had thrust hard into him. He tried to scream the pain out but found his voice trapped in his own throat so he clawed on Noiz’s back instead, sinking his fingers into his skin and drawing blood immediately. Noiz didn’t seem to feel anything as he sank himself deeper into Koujaku, his hands gripping hard on his hips. When he was finally seated completely inside Koujaku, Koujaku released him and fell back to the bed, feeling Noiz’s erection pulsing inside him. 

“Does it hurt?” Noiz asked. 

“It hurts. A lot,” Koujaku mumbled hoarsely. 

“So how does it feel—“ 

“It’s hot. I can feel you inside me. I can feel your pulse. And I feel so full there isn’t any space for me to move,” Koujaku interrupted. 

“Hmmm… It feels the same to me then, minus the heat and pain.” 

“So you can feel it after all.” 

“I can. Just not everything.” 

“……There’s something else. Something different.” 

“What is it?” 

“Your piercings. I can feel it too.” Koujaku took a deep breath and continued. “I can feel every single one of them against my skin.” 

A smile appeared on Noiz’s face as he stared at Koujaku’s reddened one. 

“You’re so cute.” 

“Wh-what—“ 

“That means,” Noiz moved almost the whole length of his dick out, and thrust roughly back into Koujaku, earning a loud moan from the older man. “I’m the only one who can make you feel this way.” He did the same thing again as Koujaku covered his mouth with the back of his hand to stifle his moans. “Am I right?” 

There was no need for an answer as Noiz grinned devilishly at Koujaku’s face, stopping after a few experimental thrusts. 

“Are you okay?” Noiz asked but Koujaku was too busy panting to answer him. “Should I continue moving?” 

Koujaku scowled, shooting him a furious but a look clearly clouded with lust. 

“Don’t ask me things like that.” 

“But I need to know.” 

“Argh, shut up, brat.” 

“So should I—“ 

“ _Move_.” 

Koujaku’s firmed voice finally ignited the flame of Noiz’s lust. With every merciless thrust, Noiz could feel himself falling deep into the burning sensation within them. The next time Koujaku looked up at him, he was surprised -- yet glad -- to see him lost in desire, a genuine lustful emotion reflected on his face. He reached out and touched the brat’s cheek, instantly feeling the warmth at his fingertips that shot right into his chest. He was about to pull him down for a kiss when he suddenly felt his nerves being attacked by a rush of electric shock, making him jolt. The sudden reaction made Noiz stop, but soon, the surprised look was replaced by a smirk as Noiz muttered.

“There you are.” 

He gripped Koujaku’s hips firmer and started thrusting hard into him again, aiming at the same spot that ahd repeatedly sent shocks all over Koujaku. In between loud moans and rough thrusts, Koujaku wrapped his arms around Noiz and finally pulled him down for a deep kiss, sucking on his tongue piercing and licking at every corner of his mouth at the same time. When they separated, Koujaku’s hands remained on Noiz’s neck as he pulled it near until their noses were touching each other. 

“I don’t want…ah!...anyone, to see this face of yours again,” Koujaku whispered into Noiz’s face. “If you want to feel pain, I’ll give it to you.” Koujaku continued as he planted a kiss on one of the bruises he can reach on Noiz’s shoulder. “Just please, don’t let anyone do this to your body again.” He muttered weakly as he kissed another one of the bruises, as if trying to kiss them away. 

As Koujaku started sucking at the red spots, Noiz groaned and grabbed Koujaku’s dick and started to jerk him off. His thrusts became fiercer and rougher as loud moans continued filling the room. A final squeeze on Koujaku’s dick and he came, spurting semen all over their abdomens. Noiz, too, came shortly after, moaning into Koujaku’s mouth as he rode his orgasm.

 

* * *

 

After that, both Koujaku and Noiz sat lazily on the bed. Noiz leaned against Koujaku’s chest as he smoked, hands playing with the short tips of Noiz’s hair. 

“You really need a haircut,” Koujaku said.

“How’s your body?” Noiz asked, pressing lightly on one of the bruises he created on Koujaku’s chest. 

“I’m fine. It was quite an experience though,” Koujaku chuckled. “But I have to say this, brat. You definitely succeeded in making me feel the pain. And I can tell you, it hurts a lot.” He flipped at finger at Noiz’s forehead, causing the younger one to scowl at him. “And I’m not talking about physical pain. You almost made my heart explode, and it reminded me badly of…” 

Koujaku’s words hanged in midair. He coughed lightly and attempted to change the topic. 

“Anyway, don’t ever do it again,” Koujaku continued. “Think about me. What if I was the one who got gang raped and they left marks everywhere on me? Will you be happy seeing those?” 

Noiz stared into space, visibly thinking. Then, he wrapped his hands around Koujaku’s waist and hugged him firmly. At that instance, Koujaku almost thought that the idea had managed to scare him but when Noiz spoke… 

“I wouldn’t mind. I still want you. I'm yours, remember?” 

He swore his heart just stopped beating for two seconds. He smiled light as he ruffled the brat’s hair and hold him closer. 

“ _Me too_.” 

At that instance, Noiz suddenly understood why Koujaku wasn’t mad at him earlier. He finally realized that what he did  had indeed, _hurt_ Koujaku, and what Koujaku felt was similar to what he felt whenever he saw Koujaku wounded, physically or mentally. 

 _Ahh, so this is how pain felt like_. 

“But that doesn’t mean you can do this again, kay,” Koujaku said in a stern tone. 

Noiz buried his head deeper into Koujaku’s chest and muttered. 

“Thank you for helping me feel pain again.”

 Koujaku smiled and kissed him lightly on the cheek before Noiz continued. 

"Now I want to hear you say you're mine."

Heat rose to Koujaku's cheek again as he smacked the brat on the head.

"Shut up, brat."

 

* * *

 

As Koujaku walked out of the bathroom, Noiz’s attention was returned to his laptop, refusing to continue with his food proposal. 

When he received no response, Koujaku walked towards Noiz and sat down beside him as he attempted to peek at what Noiz was working on his laptop. 

“What?” 

“Do you want to eat or do you want to continue playing with your gadget?” 

“I’m not playing,” Noiz retorted irritably, hands still moving rapidly on his keyboard. 

Realizing that Noiz did not possess any intention to stop whatever he was doing, Koujaku moved behind him and hugged him from the back, feeling Noiz’s typing speed slower down as he rested his chin on his shoulder. 

“Go away.” Noiz tried to push the older man away but his attempt was responded with a firmer hug. 

“Or do you want to skip dinner and go straight to the “main course”?” Koujaku whispered in his ear as he felt Noiz trembled in his embrace. 

Noiz glared sideways at him with a look filled with both annoyance and hesitation. But the moment he was pushed down on the bed, he reflexively closed his eyes as he felt Koujaku’s lips meeting his. 

Separating their kiss, Noiz scowled and pushed Koujaku away. 

“...I want extra topping,” he said with a voice so soft it sounded like a whisper. 

Koujaku smiled and ruffled his hair. 

“Roger that.”

 

At least the miserable experience taught them one thing – _honesty._


End file.
